So It’s Come To This: A Birthday Card Blog Post

Good things come in threes, apparently. My anniversary, my wife’s birthday, and Christmas come within 10 days of each other. Today is the middle point of the 10 days, her birthday. Happy Birthday! As a gift to you, I’m going to blab about you on the internet.

Things about Mary – she loves Idaho. She’d rather watch TV than a movie. She’s smart. She’s beautiful. She’s a genuinely nice and caring person. She’s independent. She thinks for herself. She’s a reader, and a librarian, which are different. She’s a good mom. She figures out the end to movies about a third of the way through. Her favorite movie for a long time was a Hard Day’s night. She likes male Australian actors (America’s current obsession with Australian and British men as leading men works in her favor). She kills me at rummy and war. She’s reasonable. She believes in service. She likes Radiohead.

In college I told my roommates I had one requirement for a wife – all other things being equal, she had to know who Morrissey was. I barely knew who Morrissey was, and I didn’t really listen to the Smiths. But I knew what people who liked Morrissey were like, and I liked them. As it turns out, Mary was in that special brand of Morrissey fans that borders on cultdom. So, check that one off the list.

The first time I really met Mary, aka talked to her and SHOOK HER HAND because she was so formal, she came over to our apartment to watch Citizen Kane. People I dated who had a good head on their shoulders were intimidated by her. They’d be like, “So, that Mary, you guys ever date?” And I’d be like, “Mary? Ha! She’s like my little sister! We get along too well to date!” Which shows how much I knew about dating.

When we did finally start dating, about two years after we met, I decided to open my soul to her and show her the movies that meant the most to me, like My Man Godfrey, Harvey, Arsenic and Old Lace. To which she said, nothing, because she fell asleep after the first ten minutes. To be fair, they were made before 1980, which requires a certain strenuous effort to absorb, but really we usually started watching about 9 pm, which was when we were both off work and out of class. Now it’s a struggle for us to stay awake past 10:30 after putting the kids to bed. We’ve come a long way.

Mary is a special kind of person my sister and I used to refer to in high school as “hardcore”. In the 90’s it meant they were tough, they lived what they believed, and they were cool. Mary is, always has been, always will be, hardcore.

Happy Birthday, babe.

4 thoughts on “So It’s Come To This: A Birthday Card Blog Post

  1. This could not be a truer representation of my dear cousin, Mary. Mary whose namesake is after my own mother. Mary is hardcore. I love and adore her. Happiest of happy birthdays my dear Mary.

  2. This was really sweet, Hans. I know Mary enough to know she’ll love it. I wish Mary lived closer so we could be running partners again. No one is a better running partner than Mary. I’m glad you have her as your “running partner.”

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